2012

Of the many surprising things that have happened in my life this year, by far the most unbelievable is that...
 I now really enjoy running and all its pains.

For growth to happen, there must be pain.

Both physically and spiritually.

That has been the theme of my 2012.

video

Here is a video to help understand what I am going to be a part of, so that you can know what your dollars are helping me accomplish for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.



To view my page directly, click here.

To DONATE to the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society, you may to to my page or by using this donate box.

Thank you for checking out this post.

I am going to RUN

Well, I havent posted in a while. I guess I have been too busy. Busy with what?

GRAD SCHOOL....

Finals are this week and I am stressed. But I have been dealing with this stress by running. Its been amazing. I have seen my body do things that I never thought I was capable of; which is amazing.

I have had a rough semester. Lots of new changes.

The GOSPEL has been so prevalent in growing me and keeping me sane.

Miraculously, I have been able to couple my spiritual growth with the wonders of physical training...the long grueling process that it is. Since I am so used to getting what I want pretty immediately because being an A-type personality in leadership in my sorority in college has taught me a lot about getting schmit done. This season of my life has been nothing like that. Its been slow, difficult, and not so over yet.

Running.

I have run in a few races and thats amazing. I did a 5K for United Cerebral Palsy and a 10K for who knows who in the Shoals. Today, I signed up for the Ronald McDonald House Charities Hot Chocolate Run 15K in Atlanta next month. Woo Hoo! I think I can do it.

Today I also found out about a program called "Team in Training," a part of Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. LLS raises money for research specifically for blood cancers, but is unique in that when researching blood, they are able to find treatments for many types of cancers.

I am going to raise money for this foundation by running in a half marathon in May. I am learning to really love running and I have found a way to run with a purpose -to help SAVE lives. Its going to change my life.

I am asking you to help. Just donate to the cause. Its easy. You can do it right here and track my progress.

This isnt about me. Its about these people who have an illness that they didnt ask for and couldn't prevent. Its changing their lives, they are spending all their time and money in the hospitals and I want to do what I can to relieve some of the burden for them.

So I am going to be so thankful for my blessings. I am going to run.

You can help too.

For years I have been convinced that I have to be perfect, or at least percieved as much, in order to hold on to friends. As I grew into the knowledge that this is a lie, I credited wounds from middle and high school that taught me to feel this way. Others' secrets and rejection make me feel unvalued, inimportant, and worthless...Like no one would want to keep me as a friend outside of some obligation.

Over the years in college, I have made significant friendship with people whom I love and am secure in the fact that love me in return. And yet, sometimes my identity still goes back to feeling valued by friendships. Even certain ones, perhaps, that hold a lot of weight in my worth. Maybe that is my problem.

I am learning in graduate school as I study theories of counseling and see how these theorists have identified human nature. Its wild that my pattern is actually a commone one with a definition: congruence is actually a resistance mechanism, or ego defense, that people innately have to use that makes them feel as if they have to be perfect in order to be whole.

Because I believe that Jesus is perfect already and has given me His perfect record, I no longer am expected by anyone who truly matters, to be perfect. To have it all...

Reality is that people do not want perfection. They hate those people. I hate those people. Why do I think I can be one?

People dont know what they want. And although I can try to do what I think people want me to, I will never please everyone. Especially myself. I just cant manipulate people into loving me.

Even when I think that I must have the right personality, sense of humor, servant heart, musical ability, perseverant drive, confidence, spiritual discipline, domestic superiotiry, all the fruits of the spirit, total dependablility, artistic and creativity, independence, intellegence, concious lifestyle, submissive attitude, flexibility, strength of an ox-emotionally, and all other things that I percieve to be valuable by others. others...who am I kidding? Men. Thats really who I aim to please if I am being honest, and still none of them want to pursue these things that I have built for myself.
Myself.
All of these things are aiming to satisfy my self.
So interesting that the Lord is showing me that I have to be giving Him all the rooms of my heart for Him to refine. And He will provide all other things. All things.

I cant build anything for myself. I have nothing to offer without His grace. My prayer is that He grow my identity in Him more. Just love Him more.

When my heart is strong- Like when my core is strong, therefore my limbs are strong- the areas for fruit in my life will be strong and productive.

Refining is tough.

Excited Life

OMG this is hilarious. Why do I relate to it so well?? Hahahaha




P.S. Kristen Bell is my only known Doppleganger....espeically when she is a brunette from that one show she was on.

  

what now

I have been struggling this week, obviously. Thinking about purpose, direction, hope, and the gospel.

And the Lord is working. He is disciplining me right now. I am not done. I still don't get it. And it is hard. But it will be sweet someday. Hopefully soon. But the alas, the Lord knows how much my heart can take.
 And it is up to Him how to refine it like gold.



When I am believing lies, what I can bank on are these:

1. Jesus is real.
2. He loves me enough to pay for my sin and give me His righteousness. I will never know why. Its a mystery.
3. He has used His position as Son and Heir to God to justify ME before the Father, Creator of the world, and Just King.
4. This Father King has thrown out my sin debt and miraculously I am no longer liable for this death that I owe.
5. I have the clean record of the perfect Son, and am also an Heiress of the King.
WHAT?!?!?!?!?!!!
6. As He gloriously reminds me of these things, I am being sanctified. Which means that I am being made more like Jesus.
7. I will never get this on my own, and will have to be reminded of these things every day for peace.
8. I am being disciplined in the Father's love... to love the things He loves and hate the things He hates- not to withhold good things from me, but to protect my heart from evil things.
9. Growth is hard.
10. I can never be snatched from His hands.

This is the gospel.

"When heart is breaking, Heaven stands. When my world is shaking, I'll never leave your hands..."

im sorry...what?

I guess I just use to think I was going somewhere. No destination set. But sure I was going. Anywhere really. But definitely headed somewhere. Now I just don't know. I can't figure out what I am waiting for.... I tell myself that it's Jesus, but I am acting like it is something or someone else that I am waiting on. I am trying to work for something. But my heart knows that I could never work enough. That is what the gospel tells me. Thats why I trust in Jesus. ok. got it. I have got to figure out what this is, though, and how to give it up. But I'm just feeling so directionless in this moment. Why dont I love grad school like I thought I would? Should I be in seminary? Should I revisit that...and all that correspondance form 1 and a half years ago? What am I thinking? Even though I know in my heart what my purpose is. How stupid is this... I have never felt more like Paul in Romans 7 than now. Where am I going and how the hell am I going to get there if Im as clueless as now. What am I hoping in? What is my Jesus plus? Is this my hormones? Is this a phase? How do I follow no one to nowhere. I am way too annoyed by all this...

Freedom

There are at least four kinds of freedom. And each one adds a crucial dimension of freedom to the last until we get to the full freedom—"free indeed." Let me try to sum up these four kinds of freedom in one definition of full and complete freedom: You are fully free—completely free, free indeed—when you have the desire, the ability, and the opportunity to do what will make you happy in a thousand years. Or we could say, You are fully free when you have the desire, the ability, and the opportunity to do what will leave you no regrets forever.

• If you don't have the desire to do a thing, you are not fully free to do it. Oh, you may muster the will power to do what you don't want to do, but nobody calls that full freedom. It's not the way we want to live. There is a constraint and pressure on us that we don't want.

• And if you have the desire to do something, but no ability to do it, you are not free to do it.

• And if you have the desire and the ability to do something, but no opportunity to do it, you are not free to do it.

• And if you have the desire to do something, and the ability to do it, and the opportunity to do it, but it destroys you in the end, you are not fully free—not free indeed.

To be fully free, we must have the desire, the ability, and the opportunity to do what will make us happy forever. No regrets. And only Jesus, the Son of God who died and rose for us, can make that possible. If the Son shall set you free, you shall be free indeed. To be happy forever, our sins must be forgiven and God's wrath removed and Christ must become our supreme Treasure. Only Jesus can do that. In fact, he has already done it. He died for our sins. He absorbed God's wrath. And he rose from the dead and is today therefore supremely precious. And he offers us that now as a free gift.

John Piper, 2011

No more waiting...

I have had some interesting conversations lately about this "True Love Waits" thing lately, then read a blog that made me start to wonder and feel convicted...

What’s it “waiting” for, anyway?

I am working with the youth girls at my church now, and I want them to be waiting for marriage for true love and all that jazz but more than that I want to see them love Jesus.


I am afraid that there are a lot of girls out there who don’t know who God is anymore – the God of their youth group years just isn’t working out. I am seeing this with the college women that I am working with and have grown with. Back then, that God said to wait for sex until you are married, until He brings the right man along for a husband. I am beginning to be concerned with those of us who signed a card and put it on the altar and pledged to wait.

And wait we did.



And waited and waited and waited.

Some of them have prayed their whole lives for a husband, and he hasn’t shown up. We have heard it all, heard the advice to “be the woman God made you to be, focus on that, and then the husband will come.” They’ve read “Lady in Waiting,” gotten super involved in church and honed their domestic skills.

And still they wait.

They hold onto a poem written to them from “God” they received in Sunday School that said, “The reason you don’t have anyone yet is because you’re not fully satisfied in Me. You have to be satisfied with Me and then when you least expect it, I’ll bring you the person I meant for you.”

“You’re right, God,” they say. “We’re not satisfied in you yet. We will put you first and then you can bring us a husband in your timing.”

Its scary that this is actually wrecking our view of God.

If this is who God’s supposed to be, then He’s tragically late.

So some decide to chuck “Lady in Waiting” out the window … and possibly their virginity with it. What next? Church... God might go next, too. If He doesn’t answer these prayers after they’ve held up their end of the bargain, why would He answer any others?

Whether it was the fault of the leaders, the fault of us girls, or both, a tragedy has happened.

A lot of girls were sold on a deal and not on a Savior.



Who wrote that poem anyway?

Pretty sure it wasn’t God.

When Jesus was here on the earth, the crowds would follow Him because they saw He gave good things. But that’s not what He wanted. He wanted their hearts for Himself. So He would turn to them and say things like, “If you don’t love Me so much that every other relationship in your life looks like hate by comparison, you can’t follow Me.” (Matthew 10:34-39)

That sounds a lot different from the poem.

Christ is the source of everything we need and the giver of all good gifts … but in telling people about Him, it’s possible we’ve sold them on a solution for life’s problems and not life itself.

What if we as girls had learned early on that having Him was everything, not a means to the life we think He would want us to have.

If we had learned we don’t abstain from sex because we’re “waiting.” We abstain because we love Him.

If I’d learned, “Fall in love with Jesus.” That’s it. Bottom line. That’s everything you need to know, to work toward, to put your hope in.

If I’d learned who He is, what He wants, how to give Him everything, not “wait” so that one day I could give my everything to someone else.

If I’d learned that it’s not bad to pray for a husband, but that my greater prayer should be for Him to spend my life as He chooses for His glory.

If we as believers make that our message, things could be drastically different for a lot of girls wondering why the God they think they learned to follow doesn’t compute. It doesn’t necessarily stop the desire for a husband or end all feelings of loneliness, but it does show a God who provides, loves and gives infinite purpose even to our singleness rather than a God who categorically denies some who pray for husbands while seemingly giving freely to others.

It shows that while marriage is good, He is the greater goal.

I dont want to live like I am waiting for something... waiting on anyone to get here.

I already have Him … and He is everything.

Thirsty

My Church is awesome. I am learning so much from them. We have been studying Revelation over the last few months and this last one has stopped me in my tracks. I feel so incredibly real and loved while thinking through what the Lord has promised for His people.

We need a vision of Heaven. We have to be prepared for our future.

What we believe about the future determines how we live in the present. 
-because we can endure hard things and persevere through the present.

What is in Heaven?
1. A renewed creation
"I am making all things new" Things will be restored into what they were meant to be back in Eden, in Genesis 1 and 2.
-When Jesus comes back, we will have renewed bodies.
-New Jerusalem will come down to earth.
-Our future, our existence, it is so material > streets, walls, trees, leaves, fruit, feasts, people, nations, kings of all nations...
 -We will build houses and live in them
 -We will plant vineyards and eat from them
 -Animals will coexist

We will be surrounded by new things...without death, decay, sickness, violence, loss, disease, and the brokenness that defines this world.

We already know that there will be no tears from early in chapter 21. This is because He has restored all things so that there is no reason for tears. All things are restored to the state of being worthy of the presence of the Lord.

2. People Groups [will be in Heaven]
- God Himself will be with them and He will be their God
- great cultural creativity will be bringing their splendor of their culture to worship God...will architects build unimaginable buildings for us to experience, or will there be many more amazing Monet-artists and Motzart-musicians? What glories will the Lord command for us all to give and enjoy about Him?

Before sin and death entered the world, Adam and Eve walked with God. There was no brokenness.
We can see Him in the New Heaven and view Earth because we will have new bodies!
We will be restored. We will be changed.

A day is coming when the separation between us and God is not there. His name is written on our foreheads.
We will finally be who we were created to be.
We will be restored and made whole.
We shall be without sin, without brokenness, without shame.

Oh how I long for this day! When I see His face!

When we get to Heaven, we are going to be restored. We will be made whole. We will be free to walk, to run, to dance. Together. With Jesus, We will be made whole. This is a big deal.

Thats what we long for. We long to be made whole- to be redeemed. We long for this for ourselves, for our friends, for our family.

Am I thirsty fo the New Heaven and New Earth? Am I satisfied with Jesus? Do I long to be healed and be made whole more than I long for these fleeting pleasures of this broken earth?

Oh Father, make me thirsty. Make me long to be healed above all things. That I would have the courage and words to say come to Jesus...to the mirror and to my peers.

Happy August

I have some exciting news!!

More on this soon....


I got the job at the university that I have been praying for, for like a year. Amazing how the Lord works.

Because I totally wouldnt have gotten on my own without His grace.

So RUSH UNA!

may your will be done on earth as it is in heaven

Why do I only pray for God's will when I think that I know what it is and that I approve of it?


I guess this is what surrender feels like.

I know that things are going to work out because God is sovereign.

I just am at a loss for words as to what to pray. But praise Jesus that the Holy Spirit intervenes on my behalf.

I just have control issues. Lord help me.

advice from a tree

True Love.

What is love?

I cant love people. Not on my own. Not without realizing what love is. This year, I have seen a raw picture of love.

It started far too many years ago for me to imagine. It got real real in Gethsemane when Jesus was preparing to be crucified. He went to the garden to get away and pray to His Father for comfort. But He was met with silence. This began His drinking of the cup of wrath on my behalf.

Jesus prayed to His Father, pleading “Abba Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.” Seeking a kindness from His Father, but only staggering to the ground as He stares into the detestable vessel that He will drink for us. This cup contains the full intensity and fierceness of God’s holy wrath poured out against all sin…that is intended for all of humanity. Ouch. Looking into this cup was as if all of the power of Mt. St Helens was contained in a coffee cup. Scary.

But what Jesus dreaded was the abandonment by His Father. See, we deserve death for our sin. Eternal separation from God. That is what Jesus faced on my behalf.

It was as if the often quoted verse, John 3:16, actually said “For God so loved the world…that He is silent to His Son’s agonizing appeal.”

This stress and utter abandonment is not something that I can grasp.

The Jesus said that He will drink my cup of wrath. He will drink it all. When He could say, “its your sin, its your cup, you drink it!” He says, I’ll drink it all.

This is love.

But there is more. Jesus rose again, defeating death. His life anew says that God has accepted His sacrifice. He gives us His righteousness. He gives me a new cup to drink. The cup of salvation. He gives it to me to drink consistently, endlessly, eternally, because it is always overflowing.

What?!

This love allows me to love. I have nothing to offer apart from this. I was dead in my sins until the Jesus who did this made me alive. He calls me to a life of repentance that I may be sanctified to be more like Him.

This is the gospel. That we depend on Christ for everything.

When we see how sinful we are, we see how great the cross is. This makes us love people and despise sin, sin that put Christ on the cross at all. All sin is the same. I want to hate it all the same. Mine, yours, theirs, ours, I just hate the brokenness of the world.

But through grace, I love you. I love people. And I just want to share hope with you. No matter your opinions, this is mine that I believe is based on truth. This is the plumline for my life that filters through all my beliefs and opinions on everything, relationships, politics, evangelism, parenting, working, all of it is filtered through this lens.

I will try not to offend any more than the gospel does because it opposes all sin.

But this is what I believe.

Relationships 101

Lets talk about Relationships...notes from a seminar

How's your heart?

• Moldable heart- youre teachable and want to learn from the word
• Broken heart- you've been hurt and are cynical about relationships
• Hard heart- you have the walls up
• Idolatrous heart- you get too excited about relationships and think they will solve your problems Despairing heart- you think youre life is unredeemable, that you're undateable

The answer to every one of these hearts is the Gospel of Jesus.

2 key perspectives for you coming into this...

1. The worlds way of doing relationships is broken- Proverbs 14:12
2. Our God is both good and wise.

In the end, relationships are a lordship issue. Are you submitted?

(This is important because who you choose to spend your life with is the biggest decision that you will make after choosing Christ. It is all about His glory. So seeking Him in this process is crucial.)

Marriage: the End in Mind
Ephesians 5:22-33

• You will never be content in marriage if you are not content in being single. The issue is with your heart towards Jesus

Why talk about marriage?

• You need to know what marriage is so you can know what dating is not.
• We bring in stuff that belongs in marriage into dating, and not just sex.
• If you have a bad marriage, it can make your life suck.
• It needs to be used for what God intends for it to.
• The worlds view of marriage is broken and warped.

What is marriage?

1. An Institution created by God- He knows how to do it best
2. It is primarily a covenant and commitment- there is a legality to it, a promise to uphold it

What are some of the implications of marriage being a covenant?

1. Not a declaration of present love, but a promise of future love. On down the road when things aren't the same, I will still love you.
1. I will be there and I will be there for you
2. Unconditional promise
3. It's not dependent on the other party fulfilling the agreement
4. It's a public declaration, before God, the government, our friends to be a corporate obligation to each other. (Bridesmaids and groomsmen are to hold you accountable in your marriage to uphold it.)
1. We think marriage is all about us, but we have to get others involved in it.

What is the purpose of marriage?
Ephesians 5:22-

1. To reflect and proclaim the Gospel of Jesus to the world
1. Biblical love in marriage is unconditional love to an undeservable person
2. It is how we show love to the world.
3. It reflects the goodness if God and Jesus and who He is
4. As a couple, we take the Gospel tithe world.
2. Grow in Christ-likeness
1. sanctification come by bumping against one another
3. To experience Oneness
1. Yes it implies sex, but also connected to one another in a spiritual way. Emotionally. You will know all the bad parts of each other and be ok as being connected.
2. You are secure with one another because you are committed each other.
3. Covenant brings freedom, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
4. this is why people who are in relationships that you know you shouldn't be in have such a hard time getting out of them.
5. Especially with prayer being so intimate, that is for the connection if commitment in marriage.
4. To have sex and make babies. A lot of sex.
1. It's a great thing...in the right context.
2. Covenant cement.
3. Psalm of Solomon.

What are the results of marriage?

• God is honored when the union represents Him.
• He is glorified when we are satisfied in Him.
• He sanctifies us through marriage.

Pitfalls to Cultural Dating

• The key factor in having a good an Godly marriage is who you choose to marry.

Hidden dangers and observations...

Something is broken

1. We are primarily appearance driven.
1. We do see and appreciate beauty because we were created to by God.
2. But there is a major flaw- this world is broken and beauty fades.
3. If we ignore true beauty and only initiate to physical beauty, we are probably in sin.
2. We are primarily feelings based.
1. The reason we get into, and out of, a relationship is how they "make me feel"
2. Feelings aren't bad, but they go up and down.
3. Something much more foundational must exist.
4. Intimacy must be there
3. We create false environments.
1. We try to hide all our flaws and impression manage by dressing up or acting interested in anything.
2. This prevents us from really getting to know someone.
3. People get to know someone for real after a few years and then bail out.
4. We play games.
1. We talk to lots of people at once and try to make them jealous.
5. We exclude healthy relationships
1. You spend all your time with the new beau and throw up defenses when people ask questions.

We play at oneness with mini marriages and mini divorces.
We flirt with oneness and get hurt.
We carry these patterns into marriage.

We have to date well so we can marry well.

Romans 12:1-2
What will empower a heart that will love unconditionally?


Looking at the cross and submitting yourself to Christ and reject what the world says. 
Being transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then we can test and approve what Gods will is.



Dating & Relationships

Biblical Principles & Applications

1. Jesus is Lord over your dating life

• Luke 9:23-24
• Have an "open hand" with dating and marriage
• when women are controlling and manipulating.
• We struggle with believing we are supposed to be at the right place at the right time to find someone
• ONLY date a growing believer
• dating leads to marriage. Duh.
• Are they Dateable? What do I look for ?
• Godliness
• they spend time with God
• if they are others centered
• friendship- easy to be around
• giving their life away
• whatever you want
• Pray for God to bring you a Godly spouse. He will transform our hearts.

2. Find your contentment in Jesus, not another person

• Jeremiah 2:13
• don't go into dating looking to get your needs met
• if can't remember a decent amount of time where you weren't with someone then probably don't need to date for a while
• become the person you want to marry

3. Date in the context of the Body of Christ

• Hebrews 3:12-13; Proverbs 15:22
• have 1 to 3 people you 100% vulnerable with and accountable to
• see counsel from Godly people who are older and wiser than you

4. Pursue Absolute Purity

• Ephesians 5:3; 1 Timothy 5:1-2
• do with each other what you would do with a sister or brother
• have not even a hint of sexual immorality
• I should check my heart that I am submissive to this because I love Jesus and want to obey Him rather than bc I feel like I am unattractive and undesirable anyway
• don't out yourselves in tempting situations
• making out is the on ramp to sex. We are not geared to stop it out it in reverse.
• remember that the closer you get emotionally and spiritually, the closer you will want to get physically and sexually
• sharing what you are learning, even in a spiritual level is natural in any relationship, but be mindful of the motives of and for intimacy

5. Look to others best interests

• Philippians 2:3-4
• you want to be motivated by how to move them towards Jesus.
• how much TIME you spend with a person
• what and how much you COMMUNICATE to a person
• what you WEAR around another person
• good filter for you... Ask "Will this push them toward me (sin) or towards Jesus?"

If you can't lead yourself spiritually, you have no business dating anybody seriously.

Some Phases

1. Cultivate friendships with people of the opposite sex.
2. Test crushes. By getting to know other people and giving it time.
3. Date them all and date them often.
1. Men you need to initiate direction when a girl starts rising to the top.
2. Women, you cannot initiate. You can't settle for a passive man.

Jesus Christ is for you. He has created marriage for His kingdom. He knows we are broken and deserve death He is offering you a new record.

A little bit of this and that...

I have realized that it is ok that i just do not like stuff and be totally fine with it. So here are some things that I just dont like:

• Using a top sheet
• Cantaloupe
• Smacking noises
• Not finishing what I start
• Anything by maybeline
• buffering
• When my sheets become untucked
• Feeling left out
• "k" texts
• Clutter
• Dirty dishes
• Taking medicine
• Blow drying my hair
• Sleeping without a stuffed animal for my arm
• Driving
• Assuming
• Toe socks
• Eating alone
• Feeling oppressed
• My sin
• Labels
• When people just don't get common courtesy
• Pumping my own gas
• Driving
• Taking out the trash
• Fabric softener
• People who value their opinion, but dont allow you to have one of your own
• Bugs in the pool
• Food in the fridge thats not in a closed container
• Stupid figurines
• Negligent molding
• Poor excuses
• Passivity

And I'm sure I'll think of more.

I think its endearing...probably

Can I just talk about my obsessions for a minute? I cant ever seem to get enough of a few things...in no particular order, of course. Im just going to freestyle and plan nothing...

• the beach, aka the sunshine
• the color turquoise, but more on the robins egg blue side
• skirts, well obviously dresses 
• florals
• things that are gold
• my grandparents, specifically my hilarious Memaw
• sandals
• contrasting patterns
• brightly colored shoes
• vintage rings
• antique stores
• Jessica Clayton's handwriting
• the roaring twenties
• the GOSPEL
• going to grad school for counseling
• being noticed
• things in miniature
• perfume samples
• painting my nails
• Jessica Laurens laugh
• being trusted
• going to the movies, intentionally
• folk music- thats a big one
• the Jesus Story Book Bible
• my secret list of baby names
• connecting with my old soul
• writing, like watching my hand write...
• making people feel affirmed
• my Mother
• Jeep wranglers
• chivalry
• being chauffeured- all the time
• fabric
• creating my own clothes
• loving who the Lord made me
• flying in airplanes!!
• Chelsea Turner's creativity and style
• the University of North Alabama
• Florence, actually
• serving others, but sometimes thats for me to feel good
• my very English teapot! (its bottom is a cup!)

well, this helps to clear my head

Reflection.

What is the Gospel?
"Only those who are aware of Gods wrath are amazed by Gods grace."
C. J. Mahaney

Do I know how much God hates sin? How much that I deserve His wrath? Do I lie my life like I am privileged to be born again?

God is just and my sin deserves my punishment. But Jesus made a way when there was no way for me to get to Him. I was hopeless and dead in y sins and He knew me. He chose to me on my side and defend me to the wrath of the Father. He paid for me and I did nothing.

This alone should motivate me to serve Him and live righteously. Bit that am motivated for Him to love me more. Because I can do nothing to make Him love me less or more than He does already. How can He? He sent His Son to die for me. How can I live like that wasn't enough?

I hear the accuser roar of sins that I have done. I know them all and thousands more, but God remembers none.

Twas Grace that taught me wart to fear and Grace my fears relieved. How precious did that Grace appear the hour that I believed.

He has done it all for me. Yet I often live like I am working for His approval. But I have it.

Jesus forgive me for not trusting you every moment. Help me to do that. Soften my heart more to you.

At the beach house...

Well folks, life has commenced at the Sandmansion. I am sitting 2 and a half kids...they are whole to me when they are walking... And I really am enjoying them. Even when they spit on me, slap me, break my stuff in a fit of rage, or tell me to leave. There are way more moments of cuddling, singing, making up songs, watching the fireworks or lightening, and playing together that are so sweet. The other day one was telling us about loving Jesus and wanting to give him a hug while the other was roaring like a lion. Presh.

I am also getting so much sun time that my neck is as red as my Indian heritage and my arm hair is blonde. Yesss life is good.

I'm back in a room with 6 girls and I'm rating it about a 6. Last summer was a 10. Room leader summer a 2. I have really got to reorganize this place for my sanity. So we are ok. I have less friends this year and the ones I do have are busy so I spend my free time laying out, sleeping, or reading. I'm about to throw some yoga in the mix. But I'm feeling better than ever since I'm not eating wheat. Taco Tuesday is better than ever and I'm dying to go back tomorrow. Maybe I'll make it today...

The Lord has me here for a reason, be it parenting lessons, a break before grad school and a real job, or lessons in loving people.. He is definitely showing me how much He loves me. Beyond being covered in sand and thinking about how He has more pleasurable thoughts about me than grains of sand on the earth, something I always think of when I'm at the beach, I am realizing how He does it all. As I watch these kids and I love them so much and I care about their hearts but when they defy me and rebel against me, it hurts me but I give them grace because I love them more than my phone or my pride. This love comes form the Lord because it is how He loves me. He looks at me as this child who is so rebellious and everything in me is innately rotten and I just want to menace all around me, but He gave me a new heart. And made me whole. While I was sitting in my filth. And how rarely I even say thank you but instead love His gifts more than Him. This has been on my mind as I learn to love the kids and other people more than myself. He is really teaching me and I am just a babysitter this summer.

Glory be to God.

its been a really really messed up week...

Not really though, I cant complain. In the last few weeks I have quit my job, had confrontational conversations with a few different people, picked up lots of extra work, prepared for the summer, and become way more in tune with my dang emotions.

My weeks have been jampacked since I got into grad school and I cannot complain. I love my life the most when A) lots of people are in it B) when Im a busy body C) when Im able to truly serve others. These have all been happening in my life lately!

The majority of my time lately I have spent either sewing or babysitting. Two of my newest hobbies. I finally finished my costumes for "Hairspray" and they looked good. I am not a professional by any imagination of the word, and so they had to do their own alterations, but hey I scored some free tickets. Lol.

I have also become convinced that somehow motherhood is in my future because of all the babysitting I have been doing, like so many families lately. There is apparently an insider network, that once you are good, people spread the word and bam there you go, busy everyday learning the different kinds of poop. Seriously, I am no longer afraid of poop...so many kinds it becomes barely gross anymore.

On a similar note, parenting is freaking hard. You have to love these curtain-climbing, crumb-snatching, ankle biters beyond their filth while they are screaming and spitting on you while throwing anything they can get their hands on at your face. And just think of them as the miracle that they are. But then, oh then they sit in your lap and cuddle with you and imitate your faces and kiss your face and they truly make the world right..for a fleeting moment before something catches their attention like your long hair that happens to be in reach.

They do prove how precious life is and what a gift it is that the Lord loves us in our sins. Children have no idea sometimes, and sometimes they do mean stuff on purpose, and it is those times when you are so close to shaking them around, you realize that we have the same broken behavior as adults and Jesus loves us enough to die for us.
He truly is our savior.

Sitting on kids has helped me to see how God sees and loves me anyway.

I am so looking forward to nannying for the Walker family on beach project this year. I may have to start a mini blog for the silly things that Keller, Owen, and Lawson do paired with the Akers, Terrell, and Stubbs boys this summer. This will be a blast.

what a freakin day...

The Lord has so totally blessed me this week, like in every way. And yet, I am still surprised.

Literally though, He has given me a new family to love and serve and learn from as I babysit their 7 amazing ginger kids, He has given me counsel in how to deal with a tough situation with my job, He has provided work hours for me, He has given me trials that cause me to depend on Him more and trust that He will grow me in love and humility, He has shown me sin and softened my heart to be repentant, and He has pointed out love to me.

This week I have been a nanny. Full on. whaaaat?? My mom was like, dang at those kids. But they were precious. I have cleaned the slimiest of diapers, rocked the whiniest of babies, and fed many kid mouths. And its be great, but so exhausting. I have gotten to see how truly dependent kids are and how really they just show us how dependent we are on the Lord. Crazy.

Today I had all the Von Trapp family...from 730 until 530, I have a 4 yr old, 2 yr old, and twin 1 yr olds. But at 330, add in the 6, 7, and 9 yr olds. From 530 to 8, I go to my normal house and have my 3 boys. As I lay on the living room floor with them, I contemplate what the parents would say if they came home and I was passed right out holding the 8 month old while the 4 and 2 yr old boys wrestled in the hallway. So I just found some old coffee and threw in the microwave. Maybe thats why I am possibly up so late...

So of course at 10am, when I have 3 kids crawling on me while watching the Jungle Book for the 3rd time in 2 days, fit hit the shan with one of my really good friends. Drama, drama, mind games, drama, bitterness, anger,  drama, rock throwing, drama, passive aggression, ignorance, drama...over some very large text messages. Great. I love confrontation, its my favorite. But I guess there is no growth without it. Its just I am not sure if the friend will even hear what I have to say, be it constructive or not. Which after seeking counsel, I think I can be very constructive. I am not guiltless. But reality is, if we love people then we are honest with them. And so that will have to happen. Unfortunately, reason is not on everyone's side here. Good thing this happened today to teach me how juggle, teach me, teach me how to juggle...all my stinkin emotions.

Because...I also had my interview for graduate school for community counseling today. Woohoo! Such an exciting time of promises. I got to share with the 4 professors in the program how much I love people, how I handle personal crises, a book that has meant a great deal to me, why Im passionate about counseling, how I have experienced success, how I would anticipate a session to go, how my involvement and volunteerism has lead me to counseling. which is all to say that people have needs and when we are able to think outside of ourselves, we not only experience more joy and fulfillment in life, but actually see the big world around us and can better relate to people in order to truly serve them. It truly was a lovely interview. I got to share my experiences in counseling, how I found the program, and tidbits of my life as an undergrad that shaped me so much. I even asked them what their favorite classes are to teach, useful information right?

Then about 1.5 hours later, I receive this via email....

So congratulations to me. I am ecstatic and thankful. 

I guess it was a good day after all. 

And I still get to deal with some consequences tomorrow...or the next day. maybe

Mr. Fun Pants

We had such a good day, my mother, sister and I.

A little campus tour, a little ricebox, a little trowbridges ice cream, a little macfarland park, a little train bridge, a little fellowship at a little dinner at Ms Scottie's, and a whole stinkin lot of grace to love on and comfort us.

We shared so many stories of Dad together and truly, just had an amazing day. It was beautiful.

A Little Princess

This is the saddest and sweetest scene in this film. Its certainly one of my favorites.

http://youtu.be/QWJxEal0ngc

The Hidden Smile of God

"He ordains then, who and where and when, the saints are to suffer. " -John Piper

My suffering isnt great. Especially when standing next to the suffering of others, from sickness to abuse, to neglect and abandonment, to persecution, to poverty...I know this.

But ten years ago today, my life was changed and I wholly doubt that I will ever cease being affected by the tragedy that rocked our world, my mother and sister and I, on that stupid and beautiful day in that stupid and unforeseen accident...

I still feel pain that knocks my breath right out of me. That causes me to become lightheaded and I have to lie down. This makes me feel weak and underestimate the power of grief and how it can rock a person.

This also makes me long more than ever to rest in the arms of my Savior as my emotions roll over me and sobs ebb like ocean waves.

I just miss my dad. He is gone. And I long to share with him how I am growing, and how I have graduated from college, and how much I learned form my sorority, and how I went to beach project 3 times, and my trip to Australia, and how much I love my new roommate, and how much I adore my church and how they impact me daily with their unwavering community and love for me. I want to sit in his lap as the 6 year old girl that I am and hear him tell me that I can be anything that I want to be because he loves me and will always support me. For him to bring me roses to anything I participate  in should I not perform to my standards (math team, always). To hear him ask me to sing again.

 Should this make me angry? Disappointed? If the big picture were about me, maybe. But its not.

But I cant get past my ultimate gratefulness that the Lord gave my dad a new heart when he was alive and that He took him to heaven.  I am so glad. Joyous. Our Savior had pursued him before he was born and gave him life, life abundantly in Him and I know that they are enjoying each other in Heaven now. I know dad didnt have an easy life, but he loved his life. The Holy Spirit was about him and everyone knew it. People were drawn into him, his stories, his laugh, his love. The Lord truly made him beautiful. And God gave him to me as a dad. How blessed am I!

The truth that gives me peace is that God governs the world and all that happens in it with purpose and design for the good of those who love Him.

My purpose in life is to love Jesus more. And this crappy situation has made me do that. Every time I want to feel angry, I do, but only for a short time before the Holy Spirit comforts me. I am having a hard time right now, and am uncomfortable posting these thoughts (maybe ill have the guts to leave this post up) but maybe someone can be encouraged that life is hard and we will hurt, and that that is ok. But much greater than us is a God who is unconditionally loving and who ordains all things.

Its hard to imagine how the Lord would ordain how He would have His people to suffer. What is the point of this suffering? It is all for His glory. Oh that He would be glorified all the more in our suffering.

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when  you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have her perfect work, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. James 1:2-4

truth- William Cowper, 1779

God moves in a mysterious way,
His wonders to perform;
He plants his footsteps in the sea,
And rides upon the storm.

Deep in unfathomable mines
Of never failing skill,
He treasures up his bright designs,
And works his sovereign will.

Ye fearful saints, fresh courage take,
The clouds ye so much dread
are big with mercy, and shall break
In blessings on your head.

Judge not the Lord by feeble sense,
But trust him for his grace;
Behind a frowning providence,
He hides a smiling face.

His purposes will ripen fast,
Unfolding every hour;
The bud may have a bitter taste,
But sweet will be the flower.

Blind unbelief is sure to err,
And scan his work in vain;
God is his own interpreter,
And he will make it plain.


How marvelous that these lines (He treasures up His bright designs, behind a frowning providence, His purposes will ripen fast, And scan HIs work in vain0 points to a deep and hope-filled conviction that God has "designs" and "purposes" in His painful "providence" and puzzling "work."

These are my confessions...

I love shoes. And these are amazing.

My BFF, Heather, let me wear hers for Easter and now I am totally hooked. And all this is well and good, but...I cant find them ANYWHERE!!

I just want all of these....

You are Jealous for Your Glory

I struggle with Jealousy.

The Lord's Jealousy is just. He deserves to be praised above all things. He created all things, after all.

My sin comes in when I am unjustly jealous for my own glory.

I so often think that I should be glorified for my works,my relationships- man do I get territorial with those, my friendliness, my looks, my things, my creativity, my experience, my degree, my "love" for others, all things of myself. I mean, I have been praised for these things in the past, why shouldnt I expect it? Because its all unworthy of praise!

The Lord's holy and withstanding attributes are the only thing substantial enough for honest glory. He deserves it. He is Just, Trustworthy, Firm, Secure, Loving, Merciful, Faithful, Kind, Generous, Omnipotent, Forknowing,...He is truly astounding. He deserves all the praise he is jealous for.

Thank you, my Father God, for loving me when I feel like I should be treated like you. You forgive my sin when I am looking right past you.

I love you Lord.

May you be praised with my Life.

 My little space. I love it so much. I love all the details, my books, my photos, my colors, my hearts, my jewelry, my flowers, everything is significant :)

 

So fun!

   

I'll fly away oh glory

Our new stairway!!! It's for the birds :)

how do I share the gospel with you

Dear Sister-Friend, 


Your'e in my life and I love you with all my heart. You know that. I tell you often. But you will never let me into your heart and share with me what you are learning. We have grown up together and I know you have all the right sunday school answers. I am concerned that there are little to no fruit in your life. How do I ask you if you are really a believer? How do I ask you if you are resting in your own self and works instead of resting in the righteousness of Christ and His work on the cross for your salvation? It seems that you are frequently leaning on your service of others for security rather than the security of Christ that nothing can ever remove you from his hands and nothing you can ever do can make Him love you an more or any less. But our relationship is so highly emotional, how do I bring this up again when you constantly shut me out and refuse to have conversations of any even remote depth with me? Unfortunately, I have become resentful at every conversation we have because it seems it is always so trivial when I just want to know if or how Jesus is working in your heart that we may connect as true sisters and enjoy Jesus all the more together. I care about the details of your life, but less than I care about that you love Jesus above everything else ever. 


Ultimately, time is on my side. and you will probably live for another 60 years and you have this time for the Lord to change your heart. He has made many promises in the bible that took 50, 100, or 1000s of years to come to fruition. So I will keep trying to have intentional conversations with you and loving you as much as I can. My prayer will ever be that the Lord will give you ears to hear and a heart that is changed to flesh as He pursues you and draws you into Himself. I pray that I can help play a part in you hearing the truth of the gospel, but really its not up to me and I am trusting that He will do His good work in you and you will finally feel free to tell me all about it. 


Praise the Lord for His good works in us. 


Twas Grace that taught my heart to fear, and Grace my fears relieved. 

on a similar note...

My favorite character in the whole book, and movie, is Caesar Flickerman. He is Amazing. His role to encourage the tributes and really does care for them. He helps out so much. And his role in narrating the games in the film was superb.

Also...

I LOVE PEETA MELLARK.

I just really love him.

Happy Hunger Games

Well everyone is talking about it...and so am I. I mean, I wasn't a communication major for nothing. And apart from how amazing the story is, the media surrounding it and the tactics employed over the last year have been superb in reeling in the necessary fan base. It has been, as expected, wildly successful.

You must live under a rock to not know that I am of course talking about The HUNGER GAMES!!

The soundtrack was released in tuesday and it is literally incredible. I love every song. Especially 'Rules' which reviewers even called the weakest song on the disc. The songs are dark enough, but hopeful, just like the story. They were written with such intent as to really capture the emotions of different characters to connect listeners to them. AAHH it has just been done so well. Another fav is the last track, Just a Game by Birdy, powerful voice with stunning words of reality and a perfect finish to prepare us for Catching Fire.

I of course went to the midnight premiere with my girlfriends. We got there like 2 hours early to get good seats and paint our nails. It was so fun dressing up like the capitol, but with a fun Katniss braid and Mockingjay-esk dress (from book 2). Although I do wish that the row of 18 year olds behind us hadnt been acting like 8 year olds, but they calmed down enough. Why is it that you can always tell who the people who are definitely still in high school are??

I am pleased with the movie. Only complaint is obviously that they left out stuff. Some I can agree with more than other parts, characters, or elements that got left behind, but then again its runtime was only 2hrs26min. I, of course, would have been more satisfied with a rated R 8 hr film to linger on the greatness of the plot. But thats showbiz, folks!
I certainly loved that parts that gave more depth and dimension to whats happening at the headquarters of the arena. Im comforted and thankful that Ms. Collins co-wrote the screen play. This assures me that with her approval, this just captures the essence of the story in an abridged, easy to swallow version.

Overall...freaking loved it. So glad that I am going again tonight to see it. (funfact: in 2008, I experience my first mega cinema in a twice in 24hrs fashion with the Dark Knight. I totally dressed up as poison ivy for that one. Still on of my favs). Tonight I will also be debuing my first made from scratch dress. So excited.

P.S. #goalupdate... I finished my dress

My Father's Daughter

In sunday school we are discussing the legacy of biblical womanhood and its dire importance. This week we covered what being a daughter means. We were asked to share what emotions were sparked within us upon hearing what the word 'daughter'. It can be a powerful trigger word and can very easily trigger an array of feelings from disappointment, longing, love, appreciation, obligation, responsibility, guilt, worry, excitement, fulfillment...

For me, now it brings me security.

I think its used to remind me of my insecurity. But I didnt realize that years ago before the Lord gave me peace and some healing in order to allow me to see my security rests in Him alone.

But since I lost my dad, I think that hearing the word daughter just reminded me that I used to be a the oldest daughter of a sweet Daddy. Its painfully lonely now just thinking through what this means.

A few years ago, I began really dealing with the loss of my Dad. Ouch.

As I was learning that as a woman, I am innately dependent on a man, I became aware that in my crucial teenage years, I lost out on a lot of security that a father is supposed to give his daughter. The mere presence of a man makes most women feel better, that somehow if her surroundings betrayed her, the man would be the warrior that he was designed to be and rescue her. I think that these are basic instincts.

And so as I began processing this whole security thing, which is way more than one blog post, I began to see where I truly suffered after my dad died that beautiful day on that stupid motorcycle. I missed his guidance, his telling me that I am worth love, and him leading me spiritually. Of course, I got this from my mom, pastor, and family. But to hear these things from a man, from your Daddy makes you feel built up like no other. None can compare with the relationship between a Daddy and his Daughter.

So now I think that the word 'daughter' reminds me of just how secure I am in Christ because He made it possible for me to get to the Father who has been watching me and pursuing me since before I was born, since before my dad was gone and He would have to really show me how to be dependent on Him alone.

I look for security in lots of things, but they rarely give me the satisfaction that I long for and its always fleeting. But by grace, I have been given new life, adopted by the Father King and nothing can snatch me from His hands.

As I realize that all the moments of suffering, from severe to tolerable to seemingly none at all, my sweet Jesus has been providing for me and giving my His security along the way.

The difference in joy and happiness is that there is still joy in suffering.

Springtiiiiimmmmeeeeee

Its finally spring and I can really break out the florals!

With such amazing weather, who can resist skirts, sundress, sandals, and vitamin D!

I am thankful for the newness of life that the spring brings, even if there are haunting memories from years past so that some anxiety dwells within me as I smell the pollen and honeysuckles in the warm air.

I am grateful for my new life.

JUST LET ME FEEL MY FEELINGS OK

I have been in THE weirdest mood all day. Lots of fluctuating feelings. WTF?

Everything just made me mad. I had a fantastic morning, and great day. And then the afternoon came.

Maybe it was hormones. This would make sense since it is shark week. But holy cow. I was greatly aggravated, by the wind blowing the blinds, the way I was sitting, the smell in the apt, the book I'm studying, the non-solitude in the room, the sleepiness in my eyes, the hunger in my middle, the money I don't have, the job I do have, the food in the fridge, the crafts I hadn't made yet...such unnecessary aggravators, but aggravators none the less. Whatever, today I was happily the typical moody female.

Just call me EVE, trying desperately to control my surroundings only to find that I cannot because they, and I, belong to God anyway and I needed to stop distrusting Him and loving Him instead....

Today I have relished in the freedom that I can just feel whatever emotions that I want to feel and just deal with them. Emotions are real. All of them. So why do we, especially as christians, always feel guilty for feeling negative emotions like anger, sadness, frustration, loneliness, disappointment, aggravation, or skepticism.
I am currently exploring the reality that though all these may not be holy, they do all exist under God and He is not particularly surprised when we experience emotions. True, we shouldn't take the consequences of feeling angry out on others and this could lead to a need for repentance if sin occurs, but it is perfectly normal to have a day where you just feel crabby.

A reality I realized today is that, these emotions passed through Jesus to get to me. And now I have them, and surely He knows how to deal with them.

It is a lie from the evil one that I should feel condemned for my negative emotions. When, in fact, I am often wearing myself out by trying to suppress my unwanted feelings. Yes this makes sense. A lot more sense than me feeling like I want to simultaneously pick a street fight, craft beautiful things with my hands, scream at the top of my lungs, and have an intense romcom cryfest anyway...

I enjoy being such a feeler (ESFJ) that even though I base my decisions on how I feel about something, I can also sit in an array of emotions and enjoy them all.

The End.

Not really, I'll have so many more emotions oh so soon....

the beauty of friendship...grace

Im so thankful for friends in my life. Like there are some women whom I appreciate so much and who are impacting my life to such a degree that I dont think I can accurately tell them how much I truly love them without it becoming a little weird. But then again, they are so great that I think they can take my emotional vomit of how much I loooove and appreciate their friendship.

Even when I am totally slangry for no reason (sleepy and angry), they just love me anyway, even if this form of love comes in the form of annoying the crap out of me.

I am always grateful for the relationships in my life that have taught me how to trust and depend on honest, open, and vulnerable friendship.

These women are in my dgroup, lead my dgroup, live with me, party with me, grew up with me, go to church with me, do my hair, cook me dinner, and give me roses. I love them with all the love that Jesus has given me :)

P.S. #goalupdate... I have finished my dresssss!!!!!! Also made a valance for my friend's house and hemmed his curtains. I am so domestic these days.
I shall add these skills to my dowery, since I dont have any goats or property...

Who is God...

Who is this God that has promised us this irresistible  covenant of promises? He guarantees  that He will hold fast to His promises.. why should we feel all confidences in trusting Him...

Because His word validates Him time and time again...through His people, He proves Himself loving, just, caring, forthcoming, and worthy of all praise.

‎- In Genesis, He is the Creator God.

- In Exodus, He is the Redeemer. 

- In Leviticus, He is your sanctification. 

- In Numbers, He is your guide. 

- In Deuteronomy, He is your teacher. 

- In Joshua, He is the mighty conqueror. 

- In Judges, He gives victory over enemies. 

- In Ruth, He is your kinsman, your lover, your redeemer. 

- In I Samuel, He is the root of Jesse. 

- In 2 Samuel, He is the Son of David. 

- In 1 Kings and 2 Kings, He is King of Kings and Lord of Lords. 

- In 1st and 2nd Chronicles, He is your intercessor and High Priest. 

- In Ezra, He is your temple, your house of worship. 

- In Nehemiah, He is your mighty wall, protecting you from your enemies. 

- In Esther, He stands in the gap to deliver you from your enemies. 

- In Job, He is the arbitrator who not only understands your struggles, but has the power to do something about them. 

- In Psalms, He is your song–and your reason to sing. 

- In Proverbs, He is your wisdom, helping you make sense of life and live it successfully. 

- In Ecclesiastes, He is your purpose, delivering you from vanity.. 

- In the Song of Solomon, He is your lover, your Rose of Sharon. 

- In Isaiah, He is the mighty counselor, the prince of peace, the everlasting father, and more. He’s everything you need. 

- In Jeremiah, He is your balm of Gilead, the soothing salve for your sin-sick soul. - In Lamentations, He is the ever-faithful one upon whom you can depend. 

- In Ezekiel, He is your wheel in the middle of a wheel–the one who assures that dry, dead bones will come alive again. 

- In Daniel, He is the ancient of days, the ever- lasting God who never runs out of time. 

- In Hosea, He is your faithful lover, always beckoning you to come back–even when you have abandoned Him. 

- In Joel, He is your refuge, keeping you safe in times of trouble. 

- In Amos, He is the husbandman, the one you can depend on to stay by your side. - In Obadiah, He is Lord of the Kingdom. 

- In Jonah, He is your salvation, bringing you back within His will. 

- In Micah, He is judge of the nation. 

- In Nahum, He is the jealous God. 

- In Habakkuk, He is the Holy One. 

- In Zephaniah, He is the witness. 

- In Haggai, He overthrows the enemies. 

- In Zechariah, He is Lord of Hosts. 

- In Malachi, He is the messenger of the covenant. 

In the New Testament: 

- In Matthew, He is king of the Jews. 

- In Mark, He is the servant. 

- In Luke, He is the Son of Man, feeling what you feel. 

- In John, He is the Son of God. 

- In Acts, He is Savior of the world. 

- In Romans, He is the righteousness of God. 

- In I Corinthians, He is the rock that followed Israel. 

- In II Corinthians, He the triumphant one, giving victory. 

- In Galatians, He is your liberty; He sets you free. 

- In Ephesians, He is head of the Church. 

- In Philippians, He is your joy. 

- In Colossians, He is your completeness. 

- In I Thessalonians, He is your hope. 

- In II Thessalonians, He is your glory. 

- In I Timothy, He is your faith. 

- In II Timothy, He is your stability. 

- In Titus He is your reason for serving. 

- In Philemon, He is your benefactor. 

- In Hebrews, He is your perfection. 

- In James, He is the power behind your faith. 

- In I Peter, He is your example. 

- In II Peter, He is your purity. 

- In I John, He is your life. 

- In II John, He is your pattern. 

- In III John, He is your motivation. 

- In Jude, He is the foundation of your faith. 

- In Revelation, He is your coming King.

If your Father were all of these things and could literally promise you the world in the form in eternal life...what would be holding you back in trusting Him with your life?