My little space. I love it so much. I love all the details, my books, my photos, my colors, my hearts, my jewelry, my flowers, everything is significant :)

 

So fun!

   

I'll fly away oh glory

Our new stairway!!! It's for the birds :)

how do I share the gospel with you

Dear Sister-Friend, 


Your'e in my life and I love you with all my heart. You know that. I tell you often. But you will never let me into your heart and share with me what you are learning. We have grown up together and I know you have all the right sunday school answers. I am concerned that there are little to no fruit in your life. How do I ask you if you are really a believer? How do I ask you if you are resting in your own self and works instead of resting in the righteousness of Christ and His work on the cross for your salvation? It seems that you are frequently leaning on your service of others for security rather than the security of Christ that nothing can ever remove you from his hands and nothing you can ever do can make Him love you an more or any less. But our relationship is so highly emotional, how do I bring this up again when you constantly shut me out and refuse to have conversations of any even remote depth with me? Unfortunately, I have become resentful at every conversation we have because it seems it is always so trivial when I just want to know if or how Jesus is working in your heart that we may connect as true sisters and enjoy Jesus all the more together. I care about the details of your life, but less than I care about that you love Jesus above everything else ever. 


Ultimately, time is on my side. and you will probably live for another 60 years and you have this time for the Lord to change your heart. He has made many promises in the bible that took 50, 100, or 1000s of years to come to fruition. So I will keep trying to have intentional conversations with you and loving you as much as I can. My prayer will ever be that the Lord will give you ears to hear and a heart that is changed to flesh as He pursues you and draws you into Himself. I pray that I can help play a part in you hearing the truth of the gospel, but really its not up to me and I am trusting that He will do His good work in you and you will finally feel free to tell me all about it. 


Praise the Lord for His good works in us. 


Twas Grace that taught my heart to fear, and Grace my fears relieved. 

on a similar note...

My favorite character in the whole book, and movie, is Caesar Flickerman. He is Amazing. His role to encourage the tributes and really does care for them. He helps out so much. And his role in narrating the games in the film was superb.

Also...

I LOVE PEETA MELLARK.

I just really love him.

Happy Hunger Games

Well everyone is talking about it...and so am I. I mean, I wasn't a communication major for nothing. And apart from how amazing the story is, the media surrounding it and the tactics employed over the last year have been superb in reeling in the necessary fan base. It has been, as expected, wildly successful.

You must live under a rock to not know that I am of course talking about The HUNGER GAMES!!

The soundtrack was released in tuesday and it is literally incredible. I love every song. Especially 'Rules' which reviewers even called the weakest song on the disc. The songs are dark enough, but hopeful, just like the story. They were written with such intent as to really capture the emotions of different characters to connect listeners to them. AAHH it has just been done so well. Another fav is the last track, Just a Game by Birdy, powerful voice with stunning words of reality and a perfect finish to prepare us for Catching Fire.

I of course went to the midnight premiere with my girlfriends. We got there like 2 hours early to get good seats and paint our nails. It was so fun dressing up like the capitol, but with a fun Katniss braid and Mockingjay-esk dress (from book 2). Although I do wish that the row of 18 year olds behind us hadnt been acting like 8 year olds, but they calmed down enough. Why is it that you can always tell who the people who are definitely still in high school are??

I am pleased with the movie. Only complaint is obviously that they left out stuff. Some I can agree with more than other parts, characters, or elements that got left behind, but then again its runtime was only 2hrs26min. I, of course, would have been more satisfied with a rated R 8 hr film to linger on the greatness of the plot. But thats showbiz, folks!
I certainly loved that parts that gave more depth and dimension to whats happening at the headquarters of the arena. Im comforted and thankful that Ms. Collins co-wrote the screen play. This assures me that with her approval, this just captures the essence of the story in an abridged, easy to swallow version.

Overall...freaking loved it. So glad that I am going again tonight to see it. (funfact: in 2008, I experience my first mega cinema in a twice in 24hrs fashion with the Dark Knight. I totally dressed up as poison ivy for that one. Still on of my favs). Tonight I will also be debuing my first made from scratch dress. So excited.

P.S. #goalupdate... I finished my dress

My Father's Daughter

In sunday school we are discussing the legacy of biblical womanhood and its dire importance. This week we covered what being a daughter means. We were asked to share what emotions were sparked within us upon hearing what the word 'daughter'. It can be a powerful trigger word and can very easily trigger an array of feelings from disappointment, longing, love, appreciation, obligation, responsibility, guilt, worry, excitement, fulfillment...

For me, now it brings me security.

I think its used to remind me of my insecurity. But I didnt realize that years ago before the Lord gave me peace and some healing in order to allow me to see my security rests in Him alone.

But since I lost my dad, I think that hearing the word daughter just reminded me that I used to be a the oldest daughter of a sweet Daddy. Its painfully lonely now just thinking through what this means.

A few years ago, I began really dealing with the loss of my Dad. Ouch.

As I was learning that as a woman, I am innately dependent on a man, I became aware that in my crucial teenage years, I lost out on a lot of security that a father is supposed to give his daughter. The mere presence of a man makes most women feel better, that somehow if her surroundings betrayed her, the man would be the warrior that he was designed to be and rescue her. I think that these are basic instincts.

And so as I began processing this whole security thing, which is way more than one blog post, I began to see where I truly suffered after my dad died that beautiful day on that stupid motorcycle. I missed his guidance, his telling me that I am worth love, and him leading me spiritually. Of course, I got this from my mom, pastor, and family. But to hear these things from a man, from your Daddy makes you feel built up like no other. None can compare with the relationship between a Daddy and his Daughter.

So now I think that the word 'daughter' reminds me of just how secure I am in Christ because He made it possible for me to get to the Father who has been watching me and pursuing me since before I was born, since before my dad was gone and He would have to really show me how to be dependent on Him alone.

I look for security in lots of things, but they rarely give me the satisfaction that I long for and its always fleeting. But by grace, I have been given new life, adopted by the Father King and nothing can snatch me from His hands.

As I realize that all the moments of suffering, from severe to tolerable to seemingly none at all, my sweet Jesus has been providing for me and giving my His security along the way.

The difference in joy and happiness is that there is still joy in suffering.

Springtiiiiimmmmeeeeee

Its finally spring and I can really break out the florals!

With such amazing weather, who can resist skirts, sundress, sandals, and vitamin D!

I am thankful for the newness of life that the spring brings, even if there are haunting memories from years past so that some anxiety dwells within me as I smell the pollen and honeysuckles in the warm air.

I am grateful for my new life.