At the beach house...

Well folks, life has commenced at the Sandmansion. I am sitting 2 and a half kids...they are whole to me when they are walking... And I really am enjoying them. Even when they spit on me, slap me, break my stuff in a fit of rage, or tell me to leave. There are way more moments of cuddling, singing, making up songs, watching the fireworks or lightening, and playing together that are so sweet. The other day one was telling us about loving Jesus and wanting to give him a hug while the other was roaring like a lion. Presh.

I am also getting so much sun time that my neck is as red as my Indian heritage and my arm hair is blonde. Yesss life is good.

I'm back in a room with 6 girls and I'm rating it about a 6. Last summer was a 10. Room leader summer a 2. I have really got to reorganize this place for my sanity. So we are ok. I have less friends this year and the ones I do have are busy so I spend my free time laying out, sleeping, or reading. I'm about to throw some yoga in the mix. But I'm feeling better than ever since I'm not eating wheat. Taco Tuesday is better than ever and I'm dying to go back tomorrow. Maybe I'll make it today...

The Lord has me here for a reason, be it parenting lessons, a break before grad school and a real job, or lessons in loving people.. He is definitely showing me how much He loves me. Beyond being covered in sand and thinking about how He has more pleasurable thoughts about me than grains of sand on the earth, something I always think of when I'm at the beach, I am realizing how He does it all. As I watch these kids and I love them so much and I care about their hearts but when they defy me and rebel against me, it hurts me but I give them grace because I love them more than my phone or my pride. This love comes form the Lord because it is how He loves me. He looks at me as this child who is so rebellious and everything in me is innately rotten and I just want to menace all around me, but He gave me a new heart. And made me whole. While I was sitting in my filth. And how rarely I even say thank you but instead love His gifts more than Him. This has been on my mind as I learn to love the kids and other people more than myself. He is really teaching me and I am just a babysitter this summer.

Glory be to God.